Only with big ole boxes and old cat boxes and Christmas stuff and office chairs and cleaning supplies and and and and.
Yesterday was a day of more movement then normal and it was good, in the sense of it being movement that came from impulse and not from “should”. Karen actually noticed at dinner as I got up to get something and to put something away and said something to the effect of “Do you know you’re moving more?” When she asked it I hadn’t been “thinking” about moving or shoulding myself to get up and do the things I was doing and I had no resistance, resentment or reluctance in my movement it was just what needed to be done. We had also “planned” to take a walk and we got involved in cleaning out a room that had become our junk room, where everything that we weren’t using and hadn’t taken to the dump or goodwill got thrown. We went in to clean it out and to create piles for goodwill or to store stuff in the garage that actually belonged there. I moved at an even pace and naturally from thing to thing without creating any of the typical resistant stuff about it. I worked up a sweat and as we were pulling old boxes down in the garage and throwing them out I did get to a place where I was clear that I was done. Instead of “soldiering” on I said that I was done in a clear and certain way that had no co-dependency wrapped around it and Karen looked at me and said she was done too. We put in about 2 hours of pretty steady physical work on something that we wanted to get done. We didn’t “finnish what we had planned to do”, and that was great because I knew that I had followed my physical impulses the entire time and that I felt a satisfaction in mySelf that was complete. It was a more satisfying feeling then exercising for the sake of exercising.
“I’m using quotes in the middle of sentences to indicate mind speak”