My current belief is, and I am willing to have this shift as I get stronger, that using the scales on a regular basis actually gets me focused in the wrong directions. I focus on results rather then consciousness and mindfulness. I begin to slide into old patterns of behavior that either support or resist the information that the scales give me. The scales used regularly can create me playing games with myself that I don’t want to play anymore. Games like weighing myself in the morning and trying to figure out the time that I will have the least additional weight, before shower or after shower, etc etc etc. Then there are all the decisions and opinions out there about how often to weigh myself. “You’re only supposed to weigh your self once a week” but there is the scale and I am having a morning when I am feeling great so I’ll weigh myself and lo and behold I have gained and so I get hopeless and go eat something, or I am having a fat day and I weigh myself and I have lost 2 pounds and I don’t believe the scale and test it to make sure it is right and then I go and eat something. So I have thrown out all scales in our house and hope to never have one again.
On the other hand I do realize the value of having ways to measure progress. Scales certainly do that. I am aware that this program is going to be much slower then any diet and exercise program I have done in the past so I am expecting progress to be slooooowed way down, hopefully like my eating. I will be going into the doctor for an annual physical and will be weighed then and there are sometimes occasions when I will be going in to a doctor for something and I will weigh myself and post it here, more out of curiosity then progress though. I want the progress to show itself more in consciousness and in the way I feel in my body. I want to keep looking deeply into completely caring for mySelf in all ways and giving mySelf all that it needs to live a vibrant, alive and healthy life.
Since I am posting this today in 2/3s I need to hold myself accountable in the area of movement.
The Bad News
I moved as little as possible yesterday and I didn’t like it. I didn’t keep my agreements around double and triple walking the stairs and I didn’t meditate. I had several opportunities to hit the stairs and didn’t. I have lots of excuses both emotional and busyness, and I know they are excuses. The only thing is to get up and get moving today.
The Good News
I am still moving more in general. I am moving more to clean up the dishes or to take out the trash. I am moving more in response to what there is to do when it’s time to do it, rather then waiting and waiting and then reluctantly getting up to go for it, I am just getting going.