Refocusing on What’s Important

Intention and the Universe   When I get clear on my Intention the Universe lines up in support.  I just have to pay attention.

Intention and the Universe
When I get clear on my Intention the Universe lines up in support.
I just have to pay attention.

Well I have officially moved over to this new blog now. This is now a public blog that anyone can come to and not a password protected private blog that I only invited people to that I know and that love and admire me. I feel a new kind of scared, I feel a twisting and turning in my solar plexus that I recognize from my days as an actor. It is the feeling of stage-fright or performance anxiety. In an my post “It’s all about Me” I stated clearly to mySelf that I wasn’t going to get caught up in writing this for others and just write this for me, creating a place where I could focus on deepening my awareness and consciousness and hold myself to account with my 1/3 2/3s program. Over the last few days I have been working hard to create an environment that would make it easy for others to find their way around easily and read what they would like. I have noticed that my posts have become more journal like and that I haven’t been digging down into my consciousness or habits much and I haven’t been allowing myself to focus on the boring facts for accountability purpose (which is really the point of this being public), and I’ve felt myself edging to trying to look good to my readers. I was about to do it again and create a sentence that was all about how tricky it was to walk the “fine line” in this blog and realized as I was writing it the smell of bullshit. There is no fine line there is only the truth and the lies that get exposed as I look inside. The truths and lies that come from my scared self are different from the truths and lies coming from my integrating Self. I need to focus on the latter and to the best of my ability ignore the former.

What I am noticing, in regards to my program, is that I am starting to create a universe that supports my program and my intention. Starting with the universe of mySelf as I start to feel smaller and I start to see myself, on occasion, in the mirror as smaller and as some clothes start to feel bigger, and as I am getting more and more conscious of what is on my plate and how much and, even more importantly, my body’s response to it. Have I had enough yet? Is this what I want? Slow down, enjoy and really feel into the responses to what is being consumed.

I am also noticing myself moving more and finding ways that my body loves to move and be still. I have felt the thrill and excitement in my body of doing something it absolutely loves to do, swimming, and am adding it my life in what ways I can. I have also incorporated meditation into my life, not as a “should” and a resisted necessity, as a thing that mySelf loves to do to clean out the cobwebs and add some healing clarity to my life and my day.

I am also creating a Universe of appreciation and inspiration around me that is encouraging me down the path that I have chosen. I am meeting all sorts of people on their own versions of a similar journey and as I listen to their programs I know longer feel threatened or any need what so ever to defend my program, take on theirs, or convert them to mine. I can stand in my own self authority and know that I am absolutely on the right path for me and see that they are on their own journey that is perfect for them and we do not have to be on the same path. This is new for me. I think so much of my resistance and defensiveness in life was based on my insecurities around the path I had chosen and feeling like there was always a better path out there, so I had to either defend it like crazy and often insult the person that was sharing with me or loose all belief in my own path and change over to their path losing a big chunk of my self confidence and belief in the process. Yuck. Now I can look out and see the Universe was just providing the same sort of encouragement and support for my journey then as now and I was just horribly misreading the signs.

So yesterday was a good day.
1/3 – Started out with a bowl of granola and coffee. Then went to our Thai cooking class and had a great time learning to cook Pad Thai, Lemon Grass Soup, Chicken and Thai Eggplants in Green Curry, Green Papaya Salad, and of course Sticky Rice and Mangos. Had a nice small tasting lunch that was a perfect 1/3 meal. Karen and I then did some shopping to buy the ingredients for the appetizers that we are going to cook today our little Oscar party. Then we met up with friends Karl and Gwen at Piatti’s restaurant and Karen and I split a chopped salad and I had a fresh homemade pasta that was delicious and was about a half portion of which I left a little on the plate. Then we went up to listen to our friend Sabrina give a delightfully spiritual/soulfull concert up at this sanctuary overlooking a twinkling San Francisco bay.
2/3s In cooking class there is lots of time on my feet and moving around the kitchen to check out this and that and to see what is going on at different stations. Lots of trolling though 2 unfamiliar super markets and parking lot walks. I would give it about a 6.5 on a scale of 10 for a 2/3s day.

2 responses to “Refocusing on What’s Important

  1. Hey Buddy,

    Yeah…. kinda scary putting it all out there for scrutiny, huh?

    I’m with you on this Journey — you can count on my for support Henry… anytime you want to compare notes, stuggles, or victories just let me know. I’ll be following along here, and hope you’ll do the same.

    Onward ho!

    Art

  2. Yes Henry….I agree with Art….kind-a-scary. A little vulnerable maybe…. and I completely admire your courage. It’s all too easy to move into those urges to “look good for the readers”….so YAHOO to YOU for identifying and climbing over it today!

    You are modeling “feel the fear and DO IT anyway” in this self-honoring endeavor. You also model full out belief in yourself & determination….in ALL of the various ways that it presents itself from day to day.

    Hugs of appreciation,
    Leann

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