In the first dream I am a teenager living with a large family like group in the middle of “the port of Newark” with huge ships moving around right in front of me. Many of these ships carry old buildings on them that are going to be dumped at sea. I want to go swimming and it isn’t right or safe to.
In the second dream I am collecting garbage in a cul de sac of a neighborhood with nice, relatively new, homes. It is my first time picking up garbage here and I am with someone who has worked here before. In each driveway is a pile of unsorted garbage and stuff. My job seems to be to bag all of the garbage and drag the bags to the truck. It is hard to tell the garbage from the stuff and there was no sorting of recycling from the garbage it all went in the clear plastic bags that were strewn about on the driveway. It was almost impossible to tell the garbage from the not garbage. We stuffed our bags and dragged them to the truck and it felt really off.
I am pretty certain my night time dreams are trying to tell me that it is time to get clear again as to what is garbage and what is not in my life and to have care as to where and how I throw the garbage out. I need to sort the “good stuff”, “the recycling”, and “the garbage” myself, no one is going to tell me what is what. I need to get rid of the stuff that needs to go someplace so that it is still “right and safe” to swim. I woke up wondering what it was that had to go and my first thoughts went to any “bad“ habits that still clung to me and that began to feel like ”whole buildings“ and driveways full of good stuff and garbage. So I am now looking at the sorting. Sorting is about consciousness. For instance, TV isn’t ”bad stinky garbage“ it does need to be sorted more consciously though. Not having a drink doesn’t mean ”take the whole building on a ship and dump it“, it means that it has to be sorted more consciously. I am also clear that the sorting needs to be done first before the garbage goes out. I can’t just throw it all out into the driveway and then hope someone else comes along and sorts it for me. They can’t help but bag it all up and toss it.
This is a more nuanced form of restraint or it is a step prior to restrain. It’s not just about holding myself back from things and learning appropriate size or amounts of things. It’s also about sorting things and discovering which things need to be held back more, which things I need to keep, and which things need to be tossed out from the get go. Once that is all done then I look at the size and amount and practice restraint and then moderation. Sort – Restraint – Moderation. All can only be done with a deepened consciousness and awareness.