I’m sitting here at the retreat center at Beit Daniel in Israel with a nicely full belly (about a 3) from a delicious lunch that Shimon the chef, one of the kindest and most loving people I’ve met, prepared for just Karen and mySelf while the participants in R5 are out in the world having a Leadership Adventure. (Which I am not going to go into any detail about because it would spoil the surprise for some of my readers who may be doing Retreat 5 at some time in the future.):-) I am feeling remarkably satisfied with the work that Karen and I have done in this retreat and with the learning and transformation that has happened. At the same time I am feeling really ready to be home. I am feeling the call of my bed, my hot tub, my kitchen, my meditation cupola, my view, my desk, my tv, and most of all my place. I have done an excellent job of creating my space and practices while being on the road for these last four weeks, worthy of hoozahs and celebrations aplenty. I have been conscious beyond my wildest imaginings 6 months ago, and I am also conscious of the gap between where I have gone and where I can still go. I have created loads of learning, transformation and change for many folks over the last 4 weeks and I have learned, seen, witnessed and discovered new things and places for and in mySelf. I have balanced being “out” and being “in” more completely and profoundly in this time that would have traditionally been “out” only, and “in” would have been fried and burnt out. I have felt the emotional ups and downs and not been swept away by them and I haven’t let the moods and crankinesses knock me out, force me to take a vacation or make me sick. I am stronger because of this experience and these 4 weeks traveling in these new and ancient lands instead of lost, homesick and not able to be present with mySelf and others that are around me. I have been clear and clean with Karen for the whole time she has been here and whenever there have been challenges, and there have been, we have moved through them quickly and painlessly. I am still here for the learning that will happen this evening and tomorrow, committed to being completely present and holding the stake of Leadership with Karen for these brilliant people. I know that there is much to learn from this adventure that they are on and during the day tomorrow as we wrap up this retreat.
And I am on the side of the arc that is looking towards home with glee and yearning. I am looking forward to getting on that plane at 5 am on Monday morning and heading back to San Francisco. I can’t wait to drive my car from the airport, hop in the hot tub, put on a good movie and settle in front of the TV and then snuggle into my incredible bed under the comforter and sleep. Home is good too. Home is where I can settle back into my program with complete ease and tune into what needs to be tweaked to get me completely back on track. Home is where I can relax into complete love and integration of ME with very little need to be anywhere for anyone, at least for a little while. I think all souls need a bit of Home to come back to. This bear is longing for his cave.
OK new Experiment for you faithful readers, a poll. Don’t know if I’ll keep this feature or not but I’ll give anything a shot to start.