Well this is it, the final day before I leave for 2 weeks. I swam, meditated and here I am writing. Keep your eyes peeled for when I come back.
Of course I am in some mystery, anticipation and expectations even about the time coming up in Tulum. I am bringing my mask, fins and snorkel with me hoping to get some swimming time in the ocean and know that it is entirely possible that we will be so engaged in our learning and consciousness brightening of ourselves and the rest of the species that having any expectations of free swim time might be a bad idea, more like hope I think. I am also stepping into a real completion of a program that I have been immersed in for almost 3 years and I am feeling all that one feels upon completion, scared and relieved, anxious and excited, ready and not done, having already left and never wanting to leave. All of those things are circling around in mySelf as I prepare to step into what’s next for me. I am really fortunate in some ways that Karen is beginning her version of the journey that I am ending, so I will be able to swim along side her as she goes and draft off of what she is learning to both remind mySelf and to deepen my own learning.
Of course I am also feeling a bit fragile about coming back to my commitments to mySelf here at home. How will I do? What will I want to continue to be committed to and what will I want to add or subtract to my commitments. I do trust that the chooser in me will be sitting in his power upon my return and that what I choose will be perfect and I must say what I have chosen I like and want to keep. So I am a bit nervous about the possible changes that are coming. I know I am not the only human on the planet that has those kind of fears. When ever most of us are headed towards a life changing rapids in our rivers of life a little anxiety naturally builds up and we want to start backpaddling a bit to stay in this nice pool we have found while at the same time we want to see what the rapids will be like and what the pool at the end of those rapids are like as well. My old friend Robert Theobold wrote a book back in the ‘80s called “The Rapids of Change” and in it he noted how we all had to get better and better at navigating those rapids. It’s one of the reasons coaching was invented. We have gotten better at navigating them and it doesn’t mean it got any easier for any of us, we just got better at it.So I am going to paddle for the top V at the head of the rapids and sharpen up my consciousness to notice all that I can as I head into these rapids with all of what I am feeling, thinking and experiencing. Whoosh…..