I have been off leading leadership and I have been off re-comiting in a new way to my body. I have started with Spark People, a facebook-like world for fitness and health and overcoming obesity. It is sort of cool as it allows me to custom design my own program and it offers guidelines to take on if I choose. It also offers up all sorts of ways to play and be supported by others and held accountable by mySelf and by others I want to play this game with. Because it’s virtual it is hard to build up expectations and be disappointed by the way others play or don’t play with me. Those disappointments often led to eventually giving up on programs and diets in the past. These disappointments were mainly with myself, of course, it was just easier to blame it on others and give myself an excuse for quitting.
As I was doing this work on the Summit and really looking deeply into the evolution of consciousness I began to realize that until I seriously dealt with this area of my life that was still out of integrity and such a massive invitation to unconsciousness I couldn’t really take that leap into the mystery mySelf with held head high and heart feeling complete and body feeling connected. So it’s off to Spark People.
The following is my first post on my Spark People blog. I haven’t found a way to link the blogs yet so I’ll just cut and paste them into this blog so that those that are interested can follow along with my physical journey if they so choose.
Well I have been tracking, to the best of my abilities, all food consumed for the last week and a half and I have been wearing a pedometer, that keeps falling off my waistband, and I have been swimming again.
This is all good and I am happy to be getting conscious again after a period of unconsciousness and weight gain, I’m sure. The nature of the consciousness I am working with this time is to sharpen my eye for measurements in addition to feeling and listening to my body for what it wants and needs. How much exercise and how much food does my body really want as opposed to what my habits, cravings and limiting beliefs are crying out for. This means slowing down and really following my food as it moves past the tongue and the taste buds down into the stomach and noticing what the signals are that my body is satisfied with what it’s getting and then stopping. This means staying conscious while I exercise and push my body into working hard and resting and slowing down when it wants to instead of pushing past to get in that length of the pool that my mind says it was going to do and after the minutes rest then looking and seeing what is really wanted here, often surprisingly it’s another lap.
While I am measuring and tracking with my eye and memory I am never certain of the accuracy according to the charts and graphs and cool stuff here on spark people. Sometimes that matters to me and other times it doesn’t. I know that my main form of measurement will be the tape measure and not the scales. I find scales ultimately very dis-insentivising, I find that over the years with all the “diets” I have learned to hate and distrust scales. I completely trust inches and I completely trust pants that didn’t fit and now fit. I completely trust toe touching and hill walking and noticing how hard my breathing is going up or down stairs. These things I trust, scales I don’t. So I have to lose the measurements of a young boy, except for height, arms and legs. I want to take 15 inches or so off waist, hips and chest, 4 inches or so of neck and I want to walk up the hill here where I live without stopping or feeling like I am going to die.
Thats All for now folks