I received lots of incredible comments in response to my posting of a couple of days ago “Begin Again”. I am grateful for any comments as they either stimulate me or acknowledge me or both. I need to continue opening my capacity to receive acknowledgment and stimulating feedback. For many years I have been a great teacher in receiving and accepting, encouraging and allowing, and vulnerability and openess. Of course as every great teacher functions, I believe, we are learning as much if not more about what we are teaching as the folks we are teaching. So I continue to learn about these wonderful states and qualities. One of the places I get to do that is here in this blog. So thank you for your comments and feedback, I am receiving them with an open and gracious heart.
My friend Doug replied to me in that same post with some feedback and really called me out on the carpet. He said it is time to change it up and kick myself in the butt. He said that I have been harping on this for a couple of years already and it’s time to put up or shut up. He said this in the tough love of a compassionate coach. From the perspective of being a reader of my blog I can really see how the point of view could develop that I am constantly circling around some of the same things over and over again and not making any progress. I don’t often write of my progress and the milestones I am meeting and successes I am having, especially in the area of my body.
So for those that want to hold me accountable to concrete results here are a few:
Since I started weighing myself (which was after I had already lost 15 or 20 pounds) I have lost 27 pounds. YAY
Shirts and pants in my closet that didn’t close before I can now wear comfortably. YAY
I don’t need a seat belt extender on airplanes anymore.
I do something physical daily, pretty much 🙂
This includes working out with a trainer once a week when I am home, going to the gym two or three more times a week when I’m home, and being much more physical around the home.
I have reduced my calorie intake in general and track my food and stay responsible for my calorie intake when I am home.
I have and use some wonderful toys that help me understand the science, weights and measurements that go into calories in and calories out. And I am pretty consistent in using them.
I am committed to shopping at Farmers Markets and eating locally the freshest and most healthfully and sustainably grown food that I can find.
I am in an extremely accountable, conscious and committed partnership with my beloved wife on all of the above and we are no longer feeling fragile or careful about the topic of our bodies around each other so that we can freely and without fear support each other.
Most importantly of all I am growing my consciousness and discovering my relationship with and the complete loving integration of my body with all the parts of mySelf.
In the name of accountability I will also report here where I have been failing and where I have a hard time counting on myself. When I travel and leave the structures that are in and around my home life I continue to struggle. Sometimes I have been able to maintain my practices and disciplines and many times I have not.
With that accountability I also want to recreate some context that is crucial for me in this journey. I AM NOT ON A DIET AND EXERCISE PROGRAM. I AM NOT A BIGGEST LOSSER AND I AM NOT IN THIS TO LOSE WEIGHT AND PRODUCE RESULTS. I am in this to completely transform my relationship with my body, to grow my consciousness, to create an integrated co-active relationship with all parts of mySelf and to walk through this lifetime with complete Self Authority. I don’t care if it takes me 10 months or 10 years to find that integrity and open that consciousness. I do care about being conscious in this moment and committed in this moment and learning all that there is to learn in this moment. I enjoy watching my belly get smaller and my clothes get bigger. I will no longer live in deprivation or lack. By being conscious I will also avoid excess and overloading. I will continue to love life, savor my senses, and enjoy eating good food and drinking good wine. I will continue to deeply explore my limiting beliefs and look for ways to replace them with life affirming beliefs.
Most of all I will do my best to live every moment as if it were my last.