Accountability

I received lots of incredible comments in response to my posting of a couple of days ago “Begin Again”. I am grateful for any comments as they either stimulate me or acknowledge me or both. I need to continue opening my capacity to receive acknowledgment and stimulating feedback. For many years I have been a great teacher in receiving and accepting, encouraging and allowing, and vulnerability and openess. Of course as every great teacher functions, I believe, we are learning as much if not more about what we are teaching as the folks we are teaching. So I continue to learn about these wonderful states and qualities. One of the places I get to do that is here in this blog. So thank you for your comments and feedback, I am receiving them with an open and gracious heart.

My friend Doug replied to me in that same post with some feedback and really called me out on the carpet. He said it is time to change it up and kick myself in the butt. He said that I have been harping on this for a couple of years already and it’s time to put up or shut up. He said this in the tough love of a compassionate coach. From the perspective of being a reader of my blog I can really see how the point of view could develop that I am constantly circling around some of the same things over and over again and not making any progress. I don’t often write of my progress and the milestones I am meeting and successes I am having, especially in the area of my body.

So for those that want to hold me accountable to concrete results here are a few:

Since I started weighing myself (which was after I had already lost 15 or 20 pounds) I have lost 27 pounds. YAY

Shirts and pants in my closet that didn’t close before I can now wear comfortably. YAY

I don’t need a seat belt extender on airplanes anymore.

I do something physical daily, pretty much 🙂
        This includes working out with a trainer once a week when I am home, going to the gym two or three more times a week when I’m home, and being much more physical around the home.

I have reduced my calorie intake in general and track my food and stay responsible for my calorie intake when I am home.

I have and use some wonderful toys that help me understand the science, weights and measurements that go into calories in and calories out. And I am pretty consistent in using them.

I am committed to shopping at Farmers Markets and eating locally the freshest and most healthfully and sustainably grown food that I can find.

I am in an extremely accountable, conscious and committed partnership with my beloved wife on all of the above and we are no longer feeling fragile or careful about the topic of our bodies around each other so that we can freely and without fear support each other.

Most importantly of all I am growing my consciousness and discovering my relationship with and the complete loving integration of my body with all the parts of mySelf.

In the name of accountability I will also report here where I have been failing and where I have a hard time counting on myself. When I travel and leave the structures that are in and around my home life I continue to struggle. Sometimes I have been able to maintain my practices and disciplines and many times I have not.

With that accountability I also want to recreate some context that is crucial for me in this journey. I AM NOT ON A DIET AND EXERCISE PROGRAM. I AM NOT A BIGGEST LOSSER AND I AM NOT IN THIS TO LOSE WEIGHT AND PRODUCE RESULTS. I am in this to completely transform my relationship with my body, to grow my consciousness, to create an integrated co-active relationship with all parts of mySelf and to walk through this lifetime with complete Self Authority. I don’t care if it takes me 10 months or 10 years to find that integrity and open that consciousness. I do care about being conscious in this moment and committed in this moment and learning all that there is to learn in this moment. I enjoy watching my belly get smaller and my clothes get bigger. I will no longer live in deprivation or lack. By being conscious I will also avoid excess and overloading. I will continue to love life, savor my senses, and enjoy eating good food and drinking good wine. I will continue to deeply explore my limiting beliefs and look for ways to replace them with life affirming beliefs.

Most of all I will do my best to live every moment as if it were my last.
        

8 responses to “Accountability

  1. Good for you, Henry! Please keep sharing your successes and failures. I love how you are embracing your physical weight and overall health as a journey in consciousness and not as number to reach (be it a weight to attain or a pants’ size to fit into). I also love how you acknowledge your wife and how you both support each other. Congratulations on your successes and failures thus far. Keep us posted.

  2. Just when I set my intention for today to expand my capacity/openness to receiving acknowledgements and feedback, I read your post! Beautiful synchronicity!
    If only I expand to 1/1000th of your capacity I’ll have burgeoned!
    okay. NOW I’m inspired.

  3. Wow, you and I are on similar quests – even up to and including the added dynamic of mutual support with spouses. Interesting synchronicity!!
    From my view, it would be great if you shared something about the tools for consciousness or anything else that have most helped you embody yourself, come into your body. I think this is crucial as the pace and speed of everything continues to accelerate relentlessly. So list books, websites, videos – that have contributed to your jouney. In our field of CTI coaching, I have found Doug Silsbee (non-CTI but at the Summits) books on Presence Based Coaching to be very valuable. I took his track at the Summit and it was great!

    • Hi Steve,
      Great you should mention Doug Silsbee. He and I, along with an incredible woman named Carey Smith, are designing a workshop that we will be doing at his place in North Carolina an August called “EcoSomatic Leadership”. We are really excited about combining the somatic work, the environmental “eco” approach and co-active leadership into a symbiotic relationship.

      We also feel that the urgency of the “quickening” is calling for leaders who are somatically, phyically, aware and responsible for their worlds.

      Here is a link. http://dougsilsbee.com/esl

  4. Nicely said and I believe every word of what you have said. I love you for your passionate energy and you are right… it is NOT about the weight loss. It HAS to be about the mind expansion and the self love or there is no juice in it anyway.
    Keep us posted and lean in when appropriate. We can hold you.

  5. Hi Henry,
    I appreciate your commitment to being in the process of living. It seems that this journey is making you aware of how you are living and giving you an opportunity to stay engaged regardless of the winning or the losing. I admire you for loving you, your greatest gift. Cherish it! Cheers.

  6. What a beautiful and powerful approach you have, Henry! I really admire how you are going about this. I think it would be quite inspirational to others.

  7. Way behind on this one. I love your transparency (though you may not want to reduce THAT much). I’ll share what’s worked for me so far.

    1. After immersion in Gary Taubes’s books (“Good Calories, Bad Calories” and “Why We Get Fat”) I converted to a position of “It’s not just how many calories but what kind of calories.” I make as many of my calories as possible protein calories – dairy, meat (even red), eggs. I’m no longer afraid of fats (bacon, butter, nuts). Some things keep me feeling full and less in need of filling up again.
    2. I’ve cut out virtually all sugar and especially high fructose corn syrup (when you read the labels, it’s incredible how many things are suffused with it). It’s the starchy starches (potatoes, breads) and the sugars which play havoc with our inner ecosomatics, causing us to be hungry soon after we snack. They cause insulin spikes.
    3. My wife and I cycled thru South Beach, modified Atkins, and Weight Watchers. In the end South Beach and modified Atkins worked well for me, but not for her; she’s returned to Weight Watchers with delightful results.
    4. Convinced that the adding of muscle burns (and continues to burn even after workouts) off fat, I now work out with weights seriously. It’s clearly going to take a full year to really see the results I want to see. Wish it was faster, but I’m learning patience.
    5. I do a variation of “slow burn” weight-lifting, which entails not more than 25 minutes a week for maximum gain (of muscle) and maximum loss (of fatty tissues). The program my wife and I follow was designed by Doug McGuff (“Body By Science”), but there are other, similar programs. The once-a-week is good for my schedule. A trainer is a plus-plus-ultra for me, too. And it helps immensely having a buddy.
    6. I’ve re-lost 20 lbs since I started the weight resistance training, 30 from when I started anything, period. The South Beach Phase I was very helpful to kick start it all. I’m getting much more body definition, and I’ll never look photoshopped.
    7. I’m most definitely interested in you living as long as possible because you add so much to the world I live in (Level 1) and you have so much more to add (Level 3). If any of this helps, great. If not, there’s always the virtual trash can.
    8. You inspire. You ARE kick-ass.

    Much love,
    Mark

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